God dammit. Now I'm pissed at Arizona, while feeling bad for my poor, poor penis.
i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
It was like if Side-show Bob had a vagina for a mouth
Watching Argentina vs Germany during a wedding on an iPhone. Thank you Steve Jobs.
He is to the point where he forgot I was in the front seat of his car while he was taking me home...that stoned
Dwarf fight at five guys. Today was a good day.
and if my full six pack comes in by Halloween there is no stopping the man slut costume. I have no shame
DOWN HORMONES. BACK.
i accidentally sent all my draft messages..how do i do damage control for the multiple "fuck me now" type msgs sent at ten am?
i only avoided him because he looked like he was about to have a heart attack and i didnt feel like doing cpr on my day off.
what type of emt are you
Whoever put salsa in the kiddie pool.....your an ass. Fuck you.
I've started budgeting for next year. It looks like I'll be crying tears of dollar bills and handing them over to pay back my unholy college debt.
I have already been up, showered, had a cup of coffee brought to me, added a little rum to cure the hangover, had sex and kicked him out and it's only 1pm. Successful day so far.
IF YOU DIE ON LSD YOU DIE FOR REAL
Hope you are okay. You were running down the street with shopping cart at one point and yelling "bitches aint shit!"
Randomize
