I'm inventing beer flavored vodka. This raspberry shit makes me feel like a pussy.
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
Jesus christ how hard is BRING SNACKS AND DRUGS to interpret? I trust your judgement on this one.
I'm too afraid that I'm 1. Banned or 2. Gonna be noticed by the lady bouncer I punched.
I gotta find new tactics tho. There's just so many tied up dicks one can look at before part of your soul dies.
I figured out that he lasts longer when I rap during sex. He made it all the way through "Love the Way you Lie"
i want to be friends with one of those mini shredded wheat men.
I owe you cheese. The drunk munchies don't acknowledge food ownership.
We're just Facebook friends. Use guy logic. I tapped your wife in high school, 20 years and 60 lbs ago, when she was hot and experimental. Why would I mess with that now? It would ruin the vivid memories of her that I keep in my spank bank.
I will find you...
Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.
After sex he cried I didn't know what to do so I patted him on the back and went to the kitchen to make waffles
There's weed in my toothpaste. Explain.
So none of you told me my tits were popping out of my shirt for three hours?
We told you. Repeatedly. You said you made it look good.
I just drank beer out of an old Vicodin bottle hoping to catch some residue. That's how finals week is going
His hair is as curly as mine. It was like watching me go down on myself.
Randomize
