I specifically asked you not to be slutty tonight.
i can totally see doctors naming an STD after you
According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.
Sunburnt clitoris. How do I deal with it.
I know now the amount of smoke it takes to set off the fire alarm....no longer worried about using the bong...not even close
i know this sounds kinda weird but his cock smelled like fabric softener. it was so refreshing.
Help. Me. He just whispered 'prepare yourself', & sprayed hairspray everywheres to make sure the 'air was crisp'
Is it uncouth to have a themed intervention? I know how much you like Star Wars.
I will seriously deflate and melt into the floor into a puddle of devestation, shame and vodka.
What not to say at an interview: i can wrap the shit out of some food.
in the future when you find clothing in your street, just assume it's mine.
And I woke up by myself with peanut butter.. Cool
someone commented on last weekends photos impressed that so many homeless people wanted to take pictures with us. weird that those "homeless people" are our friends... right?
He said I was so drunk and high that I had a conversation w/ his goldfish. The video shows me clearly conversing as if talking to a person w/ pauses in conversation and everything
It took like and hour to get him in me and then he came in like 2min. Size aint everything
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