you missed a midterm to shack? WOW. How desperate are you?
I'm going to skip that pointless convo with Mark, stick with the "we're talking" status, and bone barely legal, borderline gay, preppy guys on the DL.
I want you to come here and listen to her climax and then tell me how funny you think it is.
There's an australian, my relationship has no hope.
Why do they give me cups on $8 pitcher night? I HAVE A PITCHER.
Heed the warning of the ghost of Oktoberfest present: German beer is soooooooo much better than our watered down children's piss. also lost all my clothes and am wearing lederhosen the rest of the trip.
Well there's nothing more unattractive them a naked, soft man crying
Oh good your over him
I'm so hungover all I can do is stare at my curser and hope it starts moving on its own
He sent me a vid of himself jerking off. I hope his hands are the size of tennis rackets or it will be a very short date.
if memory serves, the guy you were hooking up with said he was a slutty skittle.
You were chugging tap water out of a running blender screaming "bubbles is Perrier mother fucker"
I let him use my phone and now I keep getting gay cruise ads, I guess he forgot to mention something.
It smells like grilled cheese and sexual frustration
Wanna get drunk and play candy land? If so you are 2 steps behind.
If I had any lingering questions about my sexuality, the strip club tonight verified I'm 100% gay
Randomize
