he started yelling "this is my pussy" mid thrust
I guess we had a small kitchen fire somehow when we decided to bake fruitroll ups and croutons...
he kept asking me if i had been in a pool or a lake recently, i didnt want to say i know where the swimmers ear came from. shower sex.
his mom found me in the closet hiding and the only thing i could think of was to sit there and wave.
it's 10:36pm. Do you know where your penis should be?
And then he said "if you were planning on bird feeding me that's not ok"
how do you not remember that?! you winked at the bouncer and then proceeded to grind on him while chugging a beer. i don't know if i should be proud or embarrassed to be your friend
Nhl reached an agreement. I plan on getting me some celebratory sex from a hockey player.
We're having Wednesday-night goat-night at the bar.
It's hard to explain...
He's hitting it raw. Might as well stick his dick in a vat of SARS at this point.
I can feel my teeth in 4 dimensions. I shouldnt be this high at 8 in the morning.
we managed to melt a few different forms of plastic into the cannibutter....
BTW, does Anne know that we used the lipstick she is currently wearing to was used to write the word "ASS" on my ass cheeks last night?
I saw an episode of cops that had one of my ex husbands on it.
I got my period on eclipse day. I'm officially in line with the moon.
Randomize
