there is this woman at the counter who looks identical to linda ellerbee. and she's grinning. COME. INSIDE. NOW.
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
Apparently we had sex last night, and then I made him drive me to the beach so I could puke in the ocean.
Are you also wondering how we get home after the party bus?
Home?
We need to play Chardee MacDennis. Contact me when you have an available date. This is not a question.
Empowerment dancing to Touch Me in the Morning by Diana Ross. Handling this breakup SO well.
I got written up at work for smelling like sex and vodka. Still not sure how they put that into professional terms.
I'm doing the Macarena naked in my living room right now
I see you're taking unemployment seriously.
Hey can you text me Heidi's phone number. I just stapled her mattress to the wall and I want to send her a picture of it.
Just found out i over drew my checking account on a 711 hot dog
Do u remember buying that
I remember eating it on the curb like a drunken hobo
I'm dipping store brand pepperoni pizza in bacon flavored ranch dressing. Obesity tastes so good.
Philosophical question for you: is it better to go into work slightly drunk or slightly coked out?
Wish me luck on my new penis adventure
true. but still. you know how big of a sucker i am for a penis and a pretty face.
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