I don't know where I am but the food in the fridge is awesome.
Michael Jackson had a heart attack when he found out boyz to men was a music group not a delivery service.
shouldn't i get a discount if shes pregnant?
honestly, magaritas are the void men can't fill.
just once id like to meet someone on craigslist who isnt fat
I just stepped on my own foot and apologized to my shoe... THAT high.
oh yea it is. i was not expecting to look at a snowbank and just see flying mushrooms
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
The 12 year old son winked and made eyes at me while his father fed me vodka gummy bears. Gameday yo
I realized after pounding back 151 and head banging into each other to "the drop" of that dub step song, that we weren't meant to have boyfriends at this point in time.
Only three months past my 21st and I'm done. So many life lessons in so little time.
He finally delivered on the dick pic, and Jesus Christ, it was worth the wait.
all I know is id definitely throw up if you guys ever dated so if you do stay the fuck away from me
Um, It's tempting but I'm not into coke or farmers.
Fuck. What bets did I make about "yeah when the Cubs win the World Series" that I gotta reneg on????
Randomize
