I dont know why I dont listen to you more often. He wont stop texting me. And his signature is "dancing with no panties on"
It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
It honestly took me longer to beat Ninja Turtles: Turtles in Time, than it did to have sex with her the first time we met.
The only thing worse than listening to you two fuck all night was waking up and smelling bacon and there not being any left.
Just went through the drive thru and got 18 free donuts in exchange for half a joint. Dunkin Donuts at midnight might become a nightly thing for us.
he broke off your car antennae to use as a walking stick before he smoked because he claimed to lack the facial strength needed to open his eyes when he's high
you said candy land and then passed out.
ps. we found your stash in the candyland game. Thanks.
damn. i can't believe how fast that went from 0 to lesbian
Please explain why there is a video of you peeing in the Taco Bell bathroom on my phone? Also why did you wink at the end?
Ice that vagina down, get some coffee, and try not to walk with a limp. It's time to dominate, pull it together
Can't keep a straight face around her after she asked me to "make fuck to her."
His dick is as big as my 7" heels... Awkwardness is forgotten.
Lesbians had sex in my bed last night. It's a thing of pride
It's no shave November. This is our time.
YOURE A FUCKING ADULT. DONT TELL ME ITS PAST YOUR BEDTIME WHEN I WANT TO GET ANOTHER COCKTAIL.
Randomize