It's more exciting when they aren't single....and even better when you have to pretend that you just slept with their roommate while trying to do the walk a shame as their girlfriend comes marching into the apt.
Im not the least bit jealous of the life you lead.
got them to do a wheelbarrow of shame down the sidewalk after the threesome. I rule
There was no way out of it, seeing as I left my photo ID right next to the vomit.
I know now the amount of smoke it takes to set off the fire alarm....no longer worried about using the bong...not even close
if you lined all their dicks up next to eachother, it would be like at&t bars
I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me
I'm in the "I'd rather have Carbs than Dick phase" part of my Life right now. YOU tell me how much Skinny Sex I'm having.
Just because you graduated a semester early, doesn't mean you can take a semester off of drinking. Sorry.
It was either the harsh truths I was divulging or the liquor..... But either way, I made mom puke
I can't believe you big bird do not remember battling a shark last night it turned into a Pokemon battle and big bird over powered the shark
FUCK IM ABOUT TO GET A DICK PIC IN THE LIBRARY
I know it's wrong but I'm human. Now get over here, tie me up, feed me pizza and Fuck the crazy out of me. Please.
Where do you think black out memories go?
Into the dark abysmal abyss of the deepest, darkest part of your mind. It's obviously the bodies natural defense to protect you from witnessing the shit you do while actually blacked out.
Went to the party dressed like a Cougar and brought a twenty something dressed as Micheal Phelps home. So far I’m loving being divorced. :-)
I’m excited to finally meet my stalkee and his penis!
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