WHY CAN'T YOU EVER SHIT LIKE A NORMAL PERSON, JESSE.
Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
If your dick isn't up when i get home you're catching tonight.
i would one night stand the shit outta him
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
i didn't realize we were even dating until i ran out of weed
Sunshine is the equivalent of sprinkling whore pellets on campus.
Made myself shower before I'd masturbate. I probably should have wined and dined myself too, but that's pushing it too far.
He's both a cowboy and a firefighter. Saying "no" was not an option.
Nothing like cleaning out your cleavage from lunch, finding cookie crumbs and eating them...
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
Coming straight to your house after the flight. If not in Federal Prison for disobeying peanut laws.
I just brought her a lipstick taser. So just remember that the next time you get smart with her
You should've seen the look on the guys face when I demanded pho and a beer the second they opened. Obviously he doesn't understand hangovers
I have all the porn. Be there soon
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