evidently tequilla and lady gaga make me flirt and grind shamlessly with other men infront of my boyfriend.
Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
he's from indiana, of course he's clueless about "g-spots"
He was making tequila spiked Arnold Palmers and murmuring things in Spanish.
I love foreign exchange students.
Nothing like a Mormon bachlorette party to make you feel slutty
I just had to dig under a pile of condoms in my desk drawer to get to a blue book. Summer is officially over.
You know it's time to cut back when your unemployed drug dealer roommate tells you that you party too hard.
I think they're German
Just say lederhosen and see what happens
For future reference.... When you take a beer out of a 6pack... You don't insert your phone as a substitute.
They're fighting and it sounds intense. Cross your fingers for their demise
Toss in some raw meat and play heavy metal music. It will insight violence.
he puked all over my guest bed and the said he felt good enough to clean it up. he poured bleach all over the bed and passed out in it. he had the chemiacal burn for a month...
No. Every time we go there, you end up getting high, then lost, then going home with strangers.
Holy Hangover.. I'm marrying whoever put this water by my bed
He said he "doesnt care at all, really" if I shave my legs or not. Challenge accepted.
Can I just go naked and covered in glitter?
Randomize