i hate having sex with him only a few drinks in. i like it better when i cant remember the gory details.
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
I think a used vibrator from amazon.com is a great valentines day gift foe my ex.
She was standing in the road flagging traffic in a tshirt and boxers. I didn't stop.
All she wanted was a cigarette
Don't talk about his dick. That's mine. There's a copyright on it. Use with permission
Someone woke me up and gave me a sprite and some pills. I put them in my belly button. Trust no one.
Codeine + Boredom = Sprinting between my front and back door.
he sent me a pic of his dick and balls out with sunglasses over them like a face. i was at dinner.
do you still have it? i kinda want to see.
I DON'T WANT TO DEMONSTRATE MY DICK TAKING ABILITIES WITH MY MOM THERE.
Have you SEEN his girlfriend?? Or talked to her? Christ almighty I'd drink every day just to die let alone black out
It is completely possible to eat beef jerky sexually.
Stalker pic that shit
He left, I think he got uncomfortable when I started singing 'oompah oompah doodley do, I have a special riddle for you'
I masturbated to my balding thirty-something co-worker last night. I am a new level of lonely.
A dry HJ only, please. I don't deserve the comforts of lube after my horrendous fantasy football performance
I've seen too many naked penises for this to be a normal Monday morning
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