We planned for the zombie apocalypse. In great detail. Of course there was booze involved.
On the bright side, I hit her with the door on the way in
Old lady caught me peeing in the street and yelled at me and said "I REBUKE YOU"
We had sex under a tree in his boss's backyard, then I hooked up with his best friend. I don't even care how I got home.
I invented the best game. It's called "what touched my exposed nutsack?" It can range from pillows to toothbrushes
Moonshine marathon is never a good idea
QUIT RUINING DICK PICTURE DAY
The attempted closet masturbation was unforgivable.
That was the most fucked up I've ever seen him. He had the fucking Canola Oil!
Got dumped. Now accepting nominations for my extra Dave Mathews ticket. No xboyfriends. Must cast final votes by Monday. Good luck everyone
He called from a stranger phone to say. He was a t a liquior store and there was a long line they have no condoms. This is the guy i was gonna go on a date with
Atleast he is letting you know he will be late
I don't know, but I assume drunk me had her reasons. I trust her judgement.
I swear the toilet was so cold I tried to stand up but my balls wer frozen to it. most awkward five minutes between me and my mom.
Had sex in a blanket fort. How was your weekend?
I'm naked on my couch and just ate a chip that was in my belly button.. my 20s have been weird.
Just let a guy I just met eat me out in a shed at a baby shower. May have sunk to a brand new low
Randomize
