Dude she looked like Jerry Garcia's knuckles
Swine flu. Run for my life!
i said send nudes i get bra and panties. thats not what i fucking asked for.
This is the LAST time i'm accepting the excuse "tequila made me do it". Even tequila thinks buying all of nickelback's itunes singles is fucking retarded
So I heard you only slept with me because you were drunk...is that true?
That depends on who this is.
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
this is the second time this week i got a blowjob from a crying girl.
my heart is telling me chinese, but my head is telling me beer.
Come out Saturday. It's for my lesbian daughter from the future birthday.
Def over. He sent me a nude selfie but cropped it right above his junk. Total Silence of the Fucking lambs looking.
You've got until 8 and then I'm kicking down your door and pouring a beer down your ass via funnel
Question for you. Do you want to go out somewhere or do you want to have sloppy joes at my house? That's not a euphemism for anything; I actually have stuff to make sloppy joes
I found a bar with Metallica and a fire eater. I'm home
This dude is trying to sext and all I can think about is taco bell and their new crunch wrap sliders
Im sitting on the floor of the hotel room eating nachos and drinking coffee. People should learn to embrace their hangovers
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