Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
ttyl tear gas
Dude, someone broke the toilet seat in two, the is a pair of panties on the kitchen counter, and the entire house smells like a brewery
in literally every picture i'm wearing less and less of my costume.
You need to fuck him. The man has his own Wikipedia.
Is it malicious or apart of the healing process if I wipe my ass with his toothbrush?
im dying and naked and this is what youre living with next year.
I take pride in being a married 31 year old who sleeps on her best friend's bathroom floor from time to time.
He was so fat that he broke two of my ribs
Maybe it's time to stop screaming I'm a chubby chaser every time you enter a drinking establishment
Would I be a horrible mom if I got a babysitter at 6am so I could go get laid.
And let me tell you, getting your ass waxed is the weirdest fucking experience.
I hate men. But I love dick. You see my problem?
He's far too busy staring into my soul to touch my tits.
Did you really kidnap my goldfish last night?
Of course my parents remember you. You showed them your tits
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