She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
By the way, your roommate is right. His penis is much bigger than yours.
I would say a second date is not looking likely, I acciedentally bit his penis. it's still bleeding 43 minutes later.
help me choose which girl to send myself boning to my girlfriend to make her want to break up
which one looks the most like her?
That's cause you yelled across the parking lot you wanted to eat her out
I woke up to him using my debit card to order PPV porn and Jimmy Johns. I don't even know his name.
I'd love to sympathize with you but I'm drunk in a mansion
Seriously I just dipped a banana in vodka I really need to stop drinking
It was all going fine until I had to chug that strawberita bud light. That really ended badly.
you just missed a great speech in which i almost coined the term "ass-ian" as in "my vaginal and ass-ian regions are no longer safe"
God please dont post that to facebook.
If you don't turn up on horseback dressed like a highwayman I am not having sex with you today
Please don't buy a buttplug. It won't fill the empty space in your heart.
He kept referring to my giving him head as a new level in our relationship and acting sentimental
You gave him a bj, not a kidney
Let’s try it, I’ve never had a bad time with sex, tacos and beer.
Would you say that skipping class and sitting alone in my room singing One Direction to myself and sobbing is an acceptable way to deal with the break-up
Randomize
