I'm gonna get wrecked tn I might have to keep my phone at home cause I'm sure ill send you really weird txts
he rolled over and started playing skeeball on his iphone after we had the best sex yet considering he only lasted 10 seconds last time.. im getting standards.. tomorrow. for now im just going to enjoy the fact i counted over 20 this time.
I've been deciding between brands of bagels for 20 minutes. This why I doint smoke weed.
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
You fought the bouncer and lost, then challenged a hobo to a 40 chugging contest and lost. Sobriety is a good life choice.
I wanna get shitfaced and yell about Tim tebow
Ahh, 151. Think of it this way: it took one shot to get you buzzed, I took eight. I may or may not have broken a tv with my skull that night and met someone's parents naked and hungover the next morning.
No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.
my phone went off during the middle of it and he ask what i was doing. he wouldn't let my reply with "your boss". ..
The dog just shocked himself by peeing on Christmas lights, should I have saw that coming?
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
I woke up with the gnarliest cold/hangover combo
Thats what u get when u have butt ass naked rooftop sex at night in december
Worth it.
After 2 minutes he came and said, "thanks for everything". I can't wait to hear what he says next time when I do more than just lay there.
I'm pretty sure I have PMS because I almost just cried about not being able to find a place that gives acrobat classes here.
I mean, I'm not hammered, but I definitely can't show my face or tits in that bowling alley again
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