half the nation just spent an hour watching a balloon fly around. we are officially the dumbest fucking country.
on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
she insisted i was the anonymous guy on formspring that kept asking to bang her
Clearly I went along with it
Just learned how to deliver a baby.the things i saw tonight can never be unseen
high in an attic. pig roast in 10.
The arresting officer told me "you probably get this a lot, but you look like anthony kiedis".
do not get into a discussion with my roommate when im sitting there naked ever again.
The bar has bullet holes in the ceiling, and the country singer had been playing drunken weezer covers. A man just bought me a beer on the grounds that I 'have his back' in a fist fight with a stranger texan. And, yes, the bartender is wearing a sherif's badge
If those antibiotics mean you can't drink, ya might as well pack your bags and re-enroll next fall, because sobriety this week would be social suicide.
New rule. No seeing movies about plane crashes after killer bong rips
Yeah I'm at work. Nothing like the threat of blowing chunks on passing cars to make you feel alive.
So what's the moral standing on reading gay porn on your phone whilst sitting next to your 87 year old Grandma?
I was less embarrassed asking him to torrent the teen mom's porn. I'm not gonna ask him to about season 4 of PLL.
i have never been so sexually frustrated as I am right now. I feel like dying...is death an option?
Sexting is killing my work productivity but it's okay because I'm self-employed
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