A stripper just got mad at me for saying goddammit. She's in no position to lecture me on morality
I love watching others lives come down to our level.
She bet her virginity on the Celtics. Looks like Kobe wont be the only one breaking in a new ring.
I swear after i took it all i did was scream for four hours
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
I woke up with a fake mustache stuck to my chest and I can't even hold down water.
Cops do not care. One just laughed and said "precious"
He tried to finger me at Disneyland! He tried to taint the happiest place on earth!
Whenever there is a ShotSki involved, I have no excuse but to drink, right? It's like a rule.
Yeah. I asked if there was a finger in my ass at some point or if I had a weird dream. So far he hasn't responded
Nothing kills the mood like him going to slap my ass and he hits his balls at the same time
I can only rely on you and Taco Bell
so in other words, they broke and fell off and I ate a gummy life saver off of his balls
Appreciate the offer but I'm a huge fan of penis
OMG I DIDNT READ THAT TEXT CAREFULLY CAUSE I'M ON THE DEVILS LETTUCE & I THREATENED TO PUNCH A CHILD OMG I'M SO SORRY
Randomize
