that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
Through a series of unfortunate circumstances, I think I just sprayed lime juice on my vagina.
Oh i know my limit. 9 shots after i've given blood.
I just inadvertently flirted with my coworker's 20-year old son. I've known him since he was 14, yet suddenly he looked different.
You are nothing if not reliable.
The guy is drinking 5 bottles of beer in a juice pitcher. Fucking amazing.
honestly, i just want you to have sex with him too so that you can fully understand my appreciation of his dick as well.
My goal of the day is to not shit myself. That's it. Setting the bar real low
sorry to break it to you, but he's definitely fucking that other girl now...
I wish I still at least had the bruises on my ass to remember him by.
I just had really awesome sex bent over the side of an air hockey table. That is all. Happy thanksgiving.
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
It made me want to take you home, put you in footie pajamas and feed you spaghettios
Apparently I give handjobs in my sleep. So that's interesting.
I found a video of us drunkenly yelling "we wanna be the Pope" as we passed around the blunt
I sharted in my christmas pjs :(
my roommates gone so i can take codeine and sleep naked
Randomize
