look no pants
Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."
Let's do it. All homo
just saw a DUI checkpoint outside of a taco bell...i feel like thats cheating...
Excuse me by sucking dick i am fighting crime. Just think of all the prostitues going out of business and getting real jobs.
my cup is half full, half full of rum.
He blew a load on his roommates pillow just to piss him off. Why did you introduce me to these people?
The guy you fucked with the lazy eye is here, im avoiding contact by texting you. But i just looked up and he recognizes me, theres no way he doesnt. I'd remember the girl who called me quasimodo all night too. Sober me feels so bad.
please tell me we weren't that bad as freshmen
i can't, we're worse now
She was rubbing her face on the carpet, she was high.
I've already dropped her on the ground of a crowded bar dancing , been incoherent drunk to the point i couldn't speak and came within 2 seconds all on separate evenings so at this point she should know what I'm about
Just saw a government minister puke and rally.
Just saw the bridesmaid use her new sister in law as a stripper pole
I mean you're asking high Chelsea. I'd sell myself for a rice crispy
from across the room i saw you look into your beer and whisper "i love you"
Randomize
