Small penises have feelings too.
He sent me a video of himself jacking off. I am not kidding.
WTF??? Isn't he married??
Yeah but his wife is at a birthday party and I guess he's bored. LOL
It was almost awkward to look at you naked while listening to Circle of Life. Just saying.
Saturday at 4 is jello wrestling sponsored by the senior class council. That's why my school is awesome. Boom.
Ummm so does anybody remember me stopping to get my ear peirced last night and make an earring out of a staple? Or did I just somehow lay on this thing and ram it through my ear?
you riverdanced for the cops while the rest ran away.
the manly guy you want to date so badly? he's at the club. as a drag queen. wearing higher heels than you own. think about that.
Not after That Night. No. I hate tequila. And it hates me. Very mutual hateship going on.
omg he is no good in bed, bless his little heart and his big dick
I ate the most amazing corn dog today.
I will probably dream about it.
Why is there puke in my guitar?
Because you puked in your guitar.
What am I doing? I'm usually only attracted to horrible people.
Come get your boyfriend. He is hammered talking to me about hot dogs and casinos.
Found my paycheck. It was in the freezer
When you called me I said did you make it home. You said yeah. Then you said you didn't know where you were. I said you were at home and you said but where. I said you are in the bathroom. Then you said oh, you're so smart lol
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