Uggggg i want to leave and get bombed over baghdad
just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
No she wasnt mad! I told her that I "mis-remembered" nailing her friend.
I'm that hungover student in class ... On a wednesday morning
Omg I think I'm in the wrong class
Running into your random closeted hookup from last night is really awkward when you have to sit next to him and his girlfriend in a 200 person class.
It was awkward at first he now knows I fucked his little brother, they were both there. then the tequila kicked in and everything was fine.
Drunk Jeff aka Dreff thinks he's about 3x cooler than be really is and about 100x better at dancing than he really is
He fucking took my shirt off and didn't even touch my boobs. What the actual fuck.
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
You were just so carefree! People were like, "there's broken glass everywhere" and you were just like, IDGAFFFFFFF
If last night was a preview of 2015, I quit.
He found out about your side hoe and still helped you try to find a lizard that got in the house
He wants me to fart in his mouth and is offering me SOOOO much coke. I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place. GIVE ME ADVICE.
I don't want to hook up with him sober. That's pretty much like saying I love you.
I’m inviting a few of my favorite manwhores to a pool party. Bring booze and wear your banana hammock so Amy can see what I’m always talking about
Randomize
