U r making out with a 12 year old get ur shit together
at least he lost his v-card with a bang... or should i say the clap.
At this point, I really just need a sign in sheet for my vagina.
I'm having horrible flashbacks of being groped by Pauly Shore.
She made me be the little spoon then she pretended to be a jet pack for an hour straight
Could someone please explain the rug burn on the right side of my face and do I need a shot of penicillin?
P.s. remind me to tell you about the porno that Paul envisioned starring you. It's wizard of oz themed.
and it seems i've caught your masturbating bug. thanks.
Which I'm also surprisingly fine with. If he walked into the bedroom naked, holding a fish in one hand and a lit candle in the other and said "Let's get fucking weird." I'd probably go with it. He's just that hot.
I just figured out how I'm going to tie you to my bed. Hint: I may have to go to the auto parts store before you get here.
I just looked down and realized I was walking around in briefs and a ninja turtle shirt; and for a second, I thought I was 8 again... Weird...
I was stuffing my vagina with gummy bears last night having him eat them out of me. Team Haribo for the win!
He puked in the middle of it and I still wasn't disappointed.
He called out my ex's name during sex.
Alex is a pretty common unisex name.
It was the same Alex. I asked.
Arrived home from picking Mom and Nana up at the airport to find Marc buck ass nude beneath the Christmas tree. Nana says she always knew I was queer.
Randomize
