hitting rock bottom=girl fakes converting to christianity in order to get out of having sex with you.
Did you see the soccer ref give that girl the red card as she was being kicked out of the party?
they bought blue cups instead of red...wtf how am i supposed to pretend im on laguna beach??
started to yawn and threw up hamburger helper instead. awesome night.
She said that I needed to "pregame her so it can slip right in."
Your penis chewing exercise is not working
ITS A JAGER BOTTLE. NOTHING CAN BE BAD IF ITS JAGER RELATED.
4 girls from the bar, me, strip basketball. here. NOW
He was just lying on my lap in the backseat screaming how if the cops came he was a blanket.
Well, my breasts are swollen and I cried about the Iditarod. But I say PMS until proven pregnant.
spring break - time to see if my two week detoxing gave my liver a chance to recover.
These beer shits have taken over my entire life.
he won't tell me his last name, but I know his garage key code
Ya know, one would think a restraining order would keep me from fucking my ex.
I think i got my first booty call. it was like she came to my house. sex. leave.
Congratulations. Welcome to the wonderful world of quick dirty secret sexy time.
thanks... i think. haha
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