I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
so i'm sitting in his room drinking tequila from the bottle and watching harry potter. he's jacking off to some porn a couple feet away from me. at one point i look over and see that he's watching me instead of the porn. please help me figure out how warped it is that i found that romantic
Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
insurance, jail, and birth control were made for people like us.
My family just legit passed around a fifth of Maker's Mark. Also, this is sort of a Thanksgiving tradition. Also, Maker's Mark is really good.
I had a dream she was puking on me, but sadly in real life she was puking on me too
We left your bucket of puke on your doorstep to clean out yourself. You're welcome.
In honor of the internet blackout, I think everyone needs to change their Facebook pictures to ones of them being blacked out.
Oh you have a half-brother? Why that's right up my alley! Let's cause family strife
Tearing families apart since 2011.
The dorm having an ice machine is their way of inviting us to make mixed drinks.
I just told the sun to stop. That hungover.
Woke up backwards on a recliner
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
Is it festive if I masturbate to Santa porn?
If you could get me there thatd be perfect. I doubt there's extradition on the moon.
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