I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
Saw shirtless man with angel wing tramp stamp seen biking in my neighborhood. Considering moving.
just won a stolen shopping cart in a dance off in a parking lot.
wait so...it's like an actual thing to masturbate using the detachable shower head? WTF I thought I was being creative!
The mystery has been solved. Seagulls have sex doggy-style.
nothing says "we're all in this together" like the herpes she passed around to our entire group of friends
There is a guy dressed as Captain America in the theatre. I want to make out with him even though I have no idea what he looks like. Wish me luck, I'm going in.
Sitting in the library studying = googling how to get laid in the library.
last karaoke night = doing dmx songs with a guy who threatened to stab me. so yeah I'm coming out.
I wanted to be mature but the vodka was resilient.
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
I would really just like to get laid somewhere that's not on a bathroom floor at this point in my life
I looked so sad that Jessica gave me a bar of soap. So that's where I'm at.
dude kate found out i cheated and busted in while i was taking a shit. I was cornered, nothing i could do
so drinking tonight?
Be there in 15
Talk shit all you want but with my new knife sharpener I have a lethal razor sharp pizza cutter. Fuck with me Mario I dare you!
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