if you dont talk to me in person you cant text me
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
Ya! She had a north face on tho so she was a classy hooker.
This girl in the gym has an amazing body...too bad there's no workout routine for a face.
all i remember is screaming butter knifes are for pussies.
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
Saw the college gyno today. It has now been medically confirmed that I have a perfect vagina.
Well, there are worse ways to make $50 at a gay club.
He pulled the washer 5 feet out from the wall screaming about quarters
please tell me why my pillow is wearing your thong...
...i wondered where i left that...
The world isn't going to end because you slept with him!
... that would be easier though.
I'm drinking wine alone, eating leftovers, and cleaning my sex toys. For the love of god, do not graduate.
Now that I'm born again, I'm preserving my gift.
Your vagina isn't a White Elephant gift. You can't re-wrap it after it's already been given several times. That's white trash thinking.
I peed on his girlfriend's loofah during our post-sex shower.
I have no idea, I usually just project my awkwardness out like a mating call until it draws other awkward members of the opposite sex out from the bushes
Randomize
