You act like I'm friends with her or something. I only screw her boyfriend!
Oh yeah.
sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.
I think I'm making progress on my commitment issues. I drunk made out with the same guy from last semester this weekend.
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
Im pretty sure he just said he wants to make a baby with me, but he's pretty shitfaced, so I'm not sure if he knows who I am.
I guess he was telling a totally normal story about being a lifeguard and I wouldn't stop screaming "THAT'S LUDICROUS" at random intervals.
We could supplement the Tour with Edward Andre-hands. Because 40s are for the 99%.
I know shes my ex. And I know she punched me in the face and stole my car to go get drunk. But it's the best sex I've ever had.
You're sick. Take pictures if you can.
She clicked her fingers, said "here boy!", and pointed at her vagina.
I think I ate my cheesy fiesta potatoes cup.
I know what you meant. If you want babies in time for your birthday, we gonna need either a time machine or a ski mask.
What's dad's email?
askmom@cause.idk
After we had sex he began to tell me the craziest places he's had sex. He told me KFC bathroom so I rolled over and went to sleep.
My boyfriend and my fuck buddy are going to the strip club together... Should I be concerned?
Its like people have to train for months before they try and drink with us and survive...
Randomize
