yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
hey my socially awkward cousin is our designated driver for summer, we just have to put up with her wierd shit.
See it, we're so close, i smell your vagisil
I woke up and we were making out. So the good news is that after two years off the market, I haven't lost a step. I'm picking up girls in my sleep now.
Do you ever just look at me and get embarrassed?
I woke up this morning with a wristband and I thought I went to the hospital last night I actually went ice skating instead
This should be a warning to men everywhere: do not send pictures of your erect penis to women you hardly know - they will add cats and send them to all of their friends.
In complete seriousness I think I am the highest person on earth
There is a mobile STD testing unit set up at my place of employment. In the lunchroom. I may need to reevaluate my career choices. And my lunch plans.
On our way there. Drinking my beer out of a coffee pot. Cuz it's my bday
Yeah, first date. First take a pic of him to circulate around for your friends and than have him fill out a short penis questionnaire. Seems completely legit to me.
Those thigh tattoos deserve the handsomest of grins between them. Dont settle.
Did you mean to say flashlight? Or did your grandpa really give you a fleshlight for your bday?
Have you ever wanted to murder the Sun? To bring the life-giving fusion reactor to a bitter end because of the sheer agony it brings to your eyes as it keeps you awake. And for waking the birds. Fuck birds.
I had a threesome with my hot neighbor and his GF and by threesome I mean I heard them getting it on in their apartment and I was in my apartment with a vibrator
and I may have moaned his name loud enough that they heard me because now he won’t make eye contact
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