He famously once noted that women should wear white "like all other domestic appliances,"
guys don't fucking realize that the only place girl like their faces jizzed on is in PORN, and that "squirting" is piss. JUST FUCKING PISS.
Haha, bad night?
strike ten. I need to stop drinkng
Sacagawea was the original milf.
The Wii Fit is already telling me I'm an alcoholic.
he was so high that he wouldn't speak to anybody for like 30 minutes, he'd only gobble, like a turkey.
He made me meet him in the baby department of walmart where he was waiting with his pregnant girlfriend. Time for a new dealer
Do not buy whiskey under any circumstances. There should be a UN sanctioned buffer zone between me and Seagrams.
Nope. If I'm going to drive an hour to fuck a teacher, it will NOT be missionary thats for damn sure.
you really cant fit homeless dj into your budget? doubles as charity
So the bartender from Applebees totally looks like he would take his clothes off for $40
I like how you possess the gift that turns normal guys into strippers
Did you really lure me out of the bar with a blond holding a dunkin donuts bag? Well played sir, well played.
My mom just told me not to dance on any tables on Halloween...I'm choosing to take that statement as a joke
chicken nuggets make me a bit homicidal
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
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