why did i save someone in my phone as corn dildo?
This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
Anyone ask you how much a bj cost yet? That shirt is so whorish
I don't think anyone has ever said "boy I'm glad I took those shots of everclear" when they wake up
I havent jerked off in so long, my dick literally prevented me from rolling over in my sleep this morning. new definition of painful?
after last nights cooking expirments i have lost all faith in the fire alarm battery
You slow danced with your carpet steamer last night.
I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
I can't live in this building much longer. People are starting to figure out that it's me making the weird sex noises.
Oh no that was the time I did the walk of shame with no shoes
U know this is gone far when im in the bathroom trying to take a pic of my asshole
I told him I was ready for another round and he said, "after this part." What guy chooses James Bond over pussy?!
I think he just shit his pants. Yep he did. That's unfortunate.
Dude. Craziest ride ever. I was convinced that the bus was an airplane. There were clouds when I looked out the window. I got really upset every time the bus turned because airplanes shouldn't turn.
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