508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
i just hope all the shady shit stops so i can let him into my pants
why is there a sandwich nailed to the wall
currently hungover, lying in bed and cutting cheese with my drivers license. ashamed? not even a little bit.
I can't stream porn because Xbox live is taking all the Internet. I thought having a male roommate would make life easier.
one of these days i'm gonna do a sparkly magical girl transformation into snoop dogg
lets go to sea world and you can just hit on every guy in a wetsuit until you get lucky
So yeah, my old kindergarten teacher just asked me who gave me the hickies on me neck.
Not entirely sure how I got drunk off 2 mimosas but here I am
Did she seriously come back inside just to piss on the kitchen floor?
He stood next to me peeing as I was puking behind a car in the parking lot, telling me how much he loved me. On the other hand, he loves me!
He's gonna fuck me, then his girlfriend is going to come over and fuck me in front of him. And they're smoking me out. Happy birthday to ME
She said she hasn't cheated on me in 7 and a half days and she'd like praise for that.
I was giving him head and he slipped one of those hats with propellors on top on my head.
Randomize
