It's going to be nice going to the airport without drugs taped to my balls like last year.
should my penis look like a turkey
Guess which guy you've blown just made me sandwich at subway?
I hope he didn't notice that my shirt was inside out when I told him I didn't have sex with the guy. Kind of a dead giveaway.
The guy in the cast riped the tap off the keg and hit steve with it
YOU RECOMMENDED ME TO THIS GIRL BECAUSE SHES A STRIPPER AND YOU KNOW MY WEAKNESS FOR STRIPPERS WITH CHILDREN.
Just pure bliss will emerge from Charles, my tranny bong.
I find out next week of the Australian was lying about his vasectomy or not. Keep your fingers crossed!
i don't know man, last time i saw her she was applying sunblock to her vagina
my boobs are worth more now than the blue book value of my car.
dude i should have never cleaned my ears out while high. theres no going back.
I feel like I got hit by a bus. A head on collision with my vag.
It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!
Ryan. I woke up. At the neighbors house. And by the neighbors. I mean the ones to the north. The ones that hate us. Please call me. I am so confused and you are gone
At the neighbors house?! Like in it or outside???
In it on the fucking couch. No idea how i got here.
Sexual Dilemma - Covid Edition: Flirting with a cute frat boy. The Cougar in me wants to go back to his frat house and fuck his cocky brains out. The adult in me doesn’t want to get Covid and have to quarantine in a frat house for 2 weeks\n
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