There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
Even if you were sober, spitters are STILL quitters, end of story.
I told you not to have sex with her on my futon
I didnt dude, i swear!
either that or you were eating mayo, which was the second thing i told you not to do on my futon
Day 5 without masturbation. Fat chicks are back on the table
She just drank the vanilla extract. Again. AGAIN. No one should be that eager to get drunk.
votre penis est TRES GRAND. i used vous because your penis is SO big
Either there is a god and he hates masturbation, or one of my roommates stole my vibrator while I was in the shower.
I got written up at work for smelling like sex and vodka. Still not sure how they put that into professional terms.
I hat to flip my "days since last bad decision" chart back to zero. So...yeah. Sigh.
I woke up on a boat next to an extremely attractive man wearing nothing but a life jacket. Neither one of us owns a boat...
My date ended with her leaving the bar with that guy who used to jerk off in the back of the school bus.
I have put on lipstick and signed up for class. Nothing more shall be expected of me today.
Pretty sure I have a sex related back injury. I'm not sure if I should be proud or ashamed.
Dick is dick. I’m not turning it down because he’s younger than me. Covid has been a real cockblock and I’m a woman with needs
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