i'm at a stripclub and this bitch just lit her nipples on fire!
I really wish i had a penis so i could dick slap that bitch right now
Worst part was I had to fart super bad and didn't want to ruin the room so I farted in a pillow and threw it under the bed.
then she woke up from sleeping for an hour and the first thing she said was "i regret it already"
I woke up on a raft in a bath tub filled with beer. excellent night.
Right, because I totally see myself driving all the way down there to fuck his world famous penis.
somehow a sneeze triggered me puking over everyone in the car
Next time he asks to wax your nipple while you're passed out I promise I'll be sober enough to intervene.
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
He gave me the award for most entertaining blow job. That should count for something.
Well my summer has already been productive. I partially caused a divorce.
Oh god theyre drunkenly throwing knifes now, definitely the best movie I've worked on
What a way to start the day. Staring at penis for 3 hours
It's pretty much my favorite thing ever
Hahaha. I'm so high, this is gonna be so intense. Even the DVD menu scared the shit out of me.
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