Don't you send me to vm
this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
Why would I want to inherit a sex machine used by my grandma?
it must be christmas time, i've got a hankering to give a virgin a baby....
Who would have thought google would have HELPED me fail a test...not pass...thank you pacman, thank you google....
His tongue was like Jesus himself was blessing my boobs for eternal ecstasy.
I'm not so sure Jesus approves of such activities, but ok.
Oh my god. He likes it up the butt. But loves womanly support. Omg. Its bad. Its bad. Ive had too much whiskey for this to be ANYthing except bad.
Sending a dick pic with a 2010 time stamp on it is violation of proper sexting etiquette
Batteries died. I don't care that you're studying for the bar. Come over. Bring the law books and study after. I'll even make coffee.
She knocked me and my drink to the ground with her ass. I have never been mad at someone for having a glorious booty.
I get a little bitchy. We all know that
He sends me pictures of his dogs and I send him my tits, it's a win win situation
Ate 3 ghost peppers and chased them with Everclear last night. Currently on the toilet cursing the universe and everyone in it.
Finally get to put my practical writing degree to use! I'm writing a craigslist ad for a threesome
Just fyi i'm now butt naked in a steam room smoking a bong in some guys house. i sense the weed penetrating my pores.
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