They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
At least I can take solace in the fact that with 8 billion some odd people in the world, at least one of them is shitting in their own car right now.
for on dont try to tell me you love me after three weeks of talking, for two if you are going to do that stay away from the song lyrics to a very good country song that you happened to ruin by using it, and for three erase my number im fuckin your sister now
day 8: i just gave goat a piece of pineapple soaked in rum. as an animal science major, im ashamed. as a normal person, it was awesome.
You kept throwing bottles at the dorm across the courtyard and when anyone told you to stop you just said "who are you? Al Gore?"
Idk, it's Grover wearing a sombrero. Do I need a reason?
Just blowing bubbles with my nipple rings in my shower.
You always make things weird.
There's a girl in class eating a pumpkin pie. Like a whole pie straight from the pan with a fork.
Best part about a crippling state-wide drought? Actually having a valid excuse for not showering
I left my ice cream out over night, it's melted, fuck this, I just poured Bailey's in it. Problems solved.
Fucking suck it up and drink your feelings like a normal human being.
Ive got small boobs, but they sure do like to pop out and party with the big dogs.
you thought the best thing to say to him was "you aint no fuckin cop"
You spilled your drink, and we laughed so hard my boobs popped out of my shirt.
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
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