I had a disgustingly explicit dream last night involving myself and lil wayne.
Seriously. Destroy her vagina. Do it like an angry baboon mating with a gentle manatee.
She made fun of how I walked so I announced to her boyfriend that I have cum on her face before.
it was like fucking with batman, he had gadgets i never even imagined
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
He says he's "masters drunk." And if that's anything like "kentucky derby drunk" I know enough to not go over there.
i'm satisfied with the level of pretty that his new girlfriend isn't.
I just reenacted what a cuntadactyl would act like by putting straws in my mouth as teeth and roaring, Plz come get me.
Go ahead. I tried to back up ur budhism story but she mite be catching on
Dammit. I hoped that would work. Just tell her I'm doing my pilgrmidge to Nepal or something.
I'm making celebratory pizza rolls. They're a lot like regular pizza rolls, but without the taste of shame.
Told him I'd blow him in the bathroom. There was a giant window everyone was looking thru. He whipped it out n I burst out laughing n walked away. Even blackout drunk I set the bar high. You should be proud.
well it got awkwardly quiet so i looked up, slapped his stomach, said "youre the best!" while pointing at him, and went right back to sucking his dick.
blue gatorade loses no color upon regurgitation
I need to wear something that says I would have sex with you but I'm not going to
I know they deliver ice cream, but do you think I can ask the delivery guy to watch the rest of the movie with me too?
Randomize
