White coat. Heels.
dude, your ex-bf is on match.com
details on that.
well, his profile doesn't say anything about herpes.
If I remember taking any of my finals after tomorrow night, it will not have been a successful night.
There's a stoned dwarf chilling in the basement here. Maybe there are redeemable qualities about this place.
When the cop tells you to leave the pool, does that mean you have to put your bathing suit back on too?
I was trying to be quiet until started to feel like my cock was being dipped in a rainbow and then I stopped caring temporarily
Im about to get a baby alligator stoned, what are you doing with your life?
Your cock deserves a montage
Last night when you stole the construction sign you told me to tell you that first you did it for the money Than you did it for the music But mostly you did it for your family
i made sure not to drool on your bed by putting my hoodie on backwards and swaddling my face in the hood
I'm going to crush up my last 7 Percocets into a fine powder and toss my popcorn in it.
It could be worse. I was dumped by a guy in a kilt after he gave my shoes away on St. Patrick's Day.
I need to reevaluate. My boss gave me drug money. I overslept on my couch. And I had my student teacher go to McDonald's and get an egg mcmuffin for me.
I threw up in the shower. I cleaned it all up and there is on mess at all. This hangover has become borderline religous. Powerful and life changing.
I just smoked part of an Oreo cuz I thought it was some hash you left
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