Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
I couldn't remember if it was hamsters or Iraq that you hated. I'm so sorry.
CANT TOUCH THIS JUST CAME ON MY IPOD. LOVE STEVE JOBS
Dude with the Beatles haircut just got his pilots license and wants to take us up to do a case race mid flight. Don't tell me networking is unnecessary.
He keeps the condoms in his bible. I guess stairs or elevator, we're getting to hell one way or another.
I am only moving my arms so I remember that I can. These brownies are wild.
The homeless guy out front said it's his birthday and he asked us to join him for happy hour after work. He's buying a fifth of gin to celebrate.
As added birth control I warned him that if he knocked me up tonight I would name the baby Truck.
You were running around yelling "BUKAKE!" and squirting people with a shampoo bottle you found. Total shitshow.
Sit down my child. It's time you were told of my famous loss-of-virginity story entitled, "The Penis that Never Could."
I just had a horrible epiphany. I have fucked girls younger than Star Tours
This text was so worth waking up to
He was hammered and shot his pistol into the lawn. Next thing I know sheriffs are at our house with M4s. He likes to party
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
Your mom has reinvented the use of a ping pong ball.
dude. I can hear the air.
Randomize