Already got asked if we're dating
I will come over but only if I don't have to take my sunglasses off for it
so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
Hey you
You're the only one I'll text back during sex. what's up?
i dont understand why you dont get why i love him. i opened the bathroom door and he had his penis in his right hand and a mcdouble in his left.
I will always remember today as the day I narrowly escaped having to touch a tiny penis
im tired of her bring homeless men home when shes drunk. THEY ARE NOT FUCKING PETS!!!!
i got her number while she was sitting next to her boyfriend. her actual number. i might be a superhero
You screamed "show me a dick stand!" But before I could ask you wft that was you had passed out in the corner
She thinks Jesus was an astronaut.
Why am I getting texts saying are you ready for this butthole? Help
is one penis in the hand worth one better nicer penis in the manscaped bush?
Clothes make me feel like a responsible adult and that's just not something I'm ready to handle.
He forgot how to sit. we had to pick him up and set him down.
Our baby is creepy.
That's how we know it's ours. haha
Randomize
