People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
You were in the bathroom for two hours practicing "Revenge Faces".
High enough to fry lime slices.....tasted like shit, by the way
I was just referred to as 'the margarita slut' by an 11 year old.
He tried to eat me out in the bath... I said it was a bad idea, but he said it was good snorkelling practice for vaca.
Pretty sure I'm taking the break up well. Alcohol made me okay with it and drugs keep me agreeing with why I dumped him in the first place.
Peeing off the roof of a motel lighting a cigar with matches and speaking fluent spanish with a chilen exchange student...how do iget into these situations?
Best oral ever, hands down so to speak. but I'm starting to want to meet that lesbian truck driver he says he's better than. Just for comparison purposes of course.
First memory of my senior year: Going into registration still drunk from last night.
The dorm having an ice machine is their way of inviting us to make mixed drinks.
I couldn't drown my sorrows in an ocean of jack daniels. They may have scuba gear.
You told me that you were mad me because I wouldn't let you 'explore my castle'. Then you said I smelled like a hospital and passed out.
She kept asking for cigarettes, than just put them in her purse as "savings"
The bad thing is that I bled through my bandages last night and keep finding blood around the house. It's almost like a scavenger hunt for solber me. I get to find out where drunk me went.
I can tell just by looking at the wedding photos that the groom has hooked up with at least three of his groomsmen. I would feel bad for her except that she’s hooked up with two of the same ones.
Randomize
