ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
I woke up at 4am on the couch with half my clothes on. And by half my clothes I mean my earrings.
birth control should be required to get into college
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
I vomitted in the hotel where they film gossip girl last night. Everywhere.
someone was throwing condoms at us.
no, they just magically show up around you.
He just said he was the Jesus of alcoholics.
WHO THE FUCK TAGS THEMSELVES AT COUNTY JAIL?!?!
This guy is trying to get me to do some acrobatic gymnast shit just so he can see "my tight hole." I'm too big to be sweating in my own damn bed. Shittttt.
Made a pinky promise to a lesbian on crack in WeHo. No one knows what I promised
Are cops allowed to hit on you if they're in uniform?! Serious question.
He congratulated me by offering up free orgasms.. I told him I also had a birthday last month we needed to celebrate.. He was there in ten minutes.
You cannot tell me you don't have a problem while crying pantsless on a stranger's sofa bed.
I've Ubered to the bar three times this weekend to get my car but every time I get there I end up drinking. Still no car.
Man it shouldn't be possible to get mad while you're stoned. I feel like ive broken one of the laws of physics
Randomize
