I'm at the psychiatrist, and this lady is crazy.. she keeps yelling about how her HMO insurance gave her breast cancer? Adderall isn't worth this.
you kept calling numbers in ur phone book and saying, "I love your show, I'm a long time listener, first time caller."
The best revenge is premature balding
Most of the time people just stick whatever they want in my mouth. Thanks for letting me decide this time
I'm just not sure how to initiate the "do you want to have sex with my boyfriend and I" conversation
it's kind of nice to have a picture of me making out with someone and actually know who it is for once
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
just heard this guy tell a story about how he got boat head. i want his life
im swimming of confusion and bacardi. where do i go from herrrrrre
I can't figure out if I'm dying from all of the booze still in my system, or from the cement wall.
There is a direct correlation between gooch size and male fertility. Science.
I COULD BREAK CONCRETE WITH MY FOOTBALL ERECTION.
A guy in a gorilla mask got blown on the lawn. And then the night got weird.
Do you know how awkward it is to get a dick pic while working at babies r us?
I want a dick in my left hand and a Crunch Wrap Supreme in my right hand.
Randomize
