R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
Just threw up off a chairlift. my life is now complete.
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
Her facebook status is 'PERCS ON DECKKK~' which is probably why she still lives with her parents.
Vegas is awesome. Its like you have a kentucky accent girls automatically assume you don't have herpes.
He tried to bang a 300 pounder last night. No joke. I shotgunned a tall boy in a bar cuz the bartender didn't crack the beer. Cant wait till Nashville.
I knew we would be good together when you made me lick jameson off your boob while you screamed along with racks on racks
I'm to the point that I've had the revelation that its physically impossible for my arms to be attached to my torso.
Sure. But we have to be quiet.
Ninja mode activated
Shouting "one vagina to rule them all" was probably not the best way to meet our best mates fiance
I just really hate taking care of things... If I can't fill it with liquor I'm not sure what to do with it.
when I type Christina's, my phone's predictive text assumes my next word is boobage
Trust me.. Might look gay.. Might feel gay... But I could snap your neck with my inside thighs bro
After 8 hours of circus trick sex, his parents are both hugging me and kissing me on the cheek asking when I'm coming back over. Score?
We're like a married couple, but we only have sex on college holidays and other people's birthdays.
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