in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
I just went in my fridge and said to my turkey "see you thursday". I seriously have issues
still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break
I just realized I've stolen a hat from every guy I fucked. Except the last one. Maybe there is hope for me.
Dude, she literally just asked me if her mac'n'cheese makes me horny. I think I found the one.
Looking for the remote in the couch. Finding Adderall beads. Considering utilizing.
I would not wish his dick upon my worst enemy
The things happening in my intestines right now should only ever happen at truck stops and frat houses.
Last night you texted me "tqiirkykbg doe freedom always"... why?
he started frosting cupcakes and licking the mini-spatula realllllly deliberately and i don't know if i'm more attracted to him or the cupcakes
I can never have sex in Utah again. The altitude had me breathing like a fat kid going up stairs.
Well, you're 18 and dating a 28 year old. Who has a wife. Who isn't you. I would guess that's why your mom frowns upon the relationship.
I didn't rip your fishnets, WE ripped your fishnets.
it was cool until he whispered 'sounds like you need a good dicking' with a completely serious face and i just lost it
So, i might have left my morals back in 2011.
Randomize
