I'm gonna have a badass scar
I guess so. I don't really give a fuck. I think I'm going to jerk off really loudly tonight just to keep them on their toes
So Delta doesn't take cash. I used my card to buy a drink and asked the attendant if she could leave it open.
I legitimately sent him a storybook of naked pictures.
This is so stupid. Now I have to call the party planner and tell her that the break up party is off. They decided to get back together.
I just sent you a google doc listing all the reasons why I should stop hooking up with him. Feel free to add to it.
This is your morning news. Today at 5 pm I will be going out of town until the 29th. If you would like some great sex before I leave, please contact me. The available packages are: a house call, an outdoor excursion, or a delivery style in-car quickie. available only while supplies last.
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
Why on earth is he slamming his body into the wall again?
I'm drinking wine from the cap of my laundry detergent container, wearing my bed sheet as a cape. How do you think I'm taking it?
I mean it was fine and all but I just don't understand why a man would need all that Simon Cowell paraphanelia
best eviction party ever.
it wasn't an eviction party you asshole, you just happened to get yourself evicted during the party.
I gave him a blowjob to kill bill. 2 of my favorite things.
Don't judge me 👊🏼 his dick just whispers my name
it's like my eyeball is being humped by my eyelid
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