think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
So I just walked into the bathroom, and there was this kid, talking to his mom, while taking a shit. I flushed the toilet next to him and heard him say into the phone, "No, I'm not. I'm in my dorm."
She literally thanked me for asking before I put in her ass
Hopefully. Play it cool. Bust out a few jokes. Chew with your mouth closed and show your boobs.
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
I feel like a food baby is going to burst from my stomach and eat all the leftovers until another food baby rips out of its stomach. And so on. It's truly a merry Christmas.
I just did a drunk experiment to find out what it looks like when you turn a burner on the stove on while wearing night-vision goggles. I may be blind in my right eye now.
Did you survive the Atlanta roadway snowpocalypse?
All the bars are closed. Might as well be dead.
I told my therapist about the other night and he actually whistled and said "wow that is not good."
She was totally amazed that i had the pizza delivery timed to coincide with our nooner and that the delivery boy knew where the broom closet on the 3rd floor was.
I mean, I've had her boob in my mouth, but is that romance?
My ex boyfriend just amazon primed me a vibrator...guess I seemed stressed?
Randomize