I just woke up and realized I puked in my boxers WTF.
You stay classy.
The worst part was I forgot until I tried to put them on.
so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
His facebook status is an owl city song. I'm so glad i didn't end up fucking him.
Just used the D.E.N.N.I.S system successfully.
You threw a hot dog at his face...I wouldn't call you either.
Dude, I had to masturbate just to stay warm. Please pay the gas bill?
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
Oh no I would never do that to her. But when you're single again let me know. Cheating penis is definitely better than single penis. But she has claws.
Just got hit on by a middle-aged puerto-rican clown who told me that it would be bad to date someone who offers to buy me coffee and makes something of themselves. I love the NY subway.
Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face.
Can you please come and collect your boss off of my kitchen floor.
The golf course isn't that incognito for sex.
I just hooked up with a one legged Australian guy. Hooray diversity!
Like I don't care that he's a drug dealer, but I have a problem with his inefficient and ineffective business model.
Don't do it. He's got a dick the size of a baseball bat. You don't want that commitment.
I have to. For the sake of science.
Randomize
