no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request
lets start a swedish sibling band together
apparently people get pissed when you take the bag of wine out of the franzia box and put it in your purse before leaving the party
This is the LAST time i'm accepting the excuse "tequila made me do it". Even tequila thinks buying all of nickelback's itunes singles is fucking retarded
I had some like war flashbacks of giving someone a handjob and i was trying to figure out who it was.
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
Just had a tranny complement my outfit. Looks like I'll have to change before we go out.
It's like we come as a package. Your slogan should be "be in my family, sleep with my roommate."
My slogan can be "bonding the family together. One dick at a time."
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
She thinks I come over for the sex, but I really come for the snacks.
After the apocalypse all we'll have is vodka and twinkles.
I've just had two stress filled days in a row , I'm just going to shower and await your penis
Well my mom knows that the welt I had on my forehead last month was the result of a sex accident. This holiday sucks
I HAVE A TEST I'M SORRY YOUR UN SUCKED DICK ISN'T MY FIRST CONCERN
You know it's a bad cold when sneezing feels better than orgasming...
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