I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
every time i send "do you want some cock" to her T9 manages to change it to "anal"...i think she's mad now
You had sex with him even after he literally described himself as a "coldplay guy"? There's a line you just don't cross. There is a line.
I am going to get arrested. I am yelling fuck repeatedly, wearing a Bird jersey and polka dot pants while pounding wine. Amazing mug shot to follow.
time for a it's-monday-night-and-this-week-is-gunna-suck-drink.
i can't find my house
we droppd you off right in front! i even walked you to the steps less then 3 mins ago.
i'm pretty sure my house moved.
It's 4th of July all over again, we were chasing with the pool water.
Did you know that if you hit someone in the head with a frozen loaf of bread you can knock them unconscious?
You're lucky I'm tired or I'd take a pic of me mounting a reindeer yard decoration
struggle bus is officially taking me on a road trip to hell. If this is just the first destination, I'll jump out the fucking window.
So like if I threw up in my purse is that "don't ever show your face in public again" worthy or just slightly frowned upon
last night we watched this really loud chick try and pick up this smoking french guy who's english was sooo bad. she finally pointed at her beer and then her vagine
gross
like you've never done an interperative dance for sex, please
dude, totally just walked home...using pizza as gloves
How early is too early to start day drinking? Asking for a friend
About five minutes ago. You’re good now.
Maybe I’ll just go to the party as myself
What, a homewrecker?
Touché
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